Marriage Matters

We have the opportunity to to work with so many people, creating videos to tell so many different kinds of stories.  While we greatly enjoy ALL of the work we do….the reason we got into filmmaking is weddings.  When you check out our website, weddings make up over half of the content we choose to feature.  Compared with the commercial, documentary, and non-profit work that we do…weddings are HARD work.  Long long days, dealing with lighting conditions that aren’t always ideal, weather that you have to just keep working through, lugging your gear through large resorts (I know, that one sounds like such a whine, but trust me, that crap gets heavy!), takes up all your weekends. Why spend so much time and energy on weddings?

Well first off, there are two kids of people in the world: those that love weddings, and those that do not.  I am 100% a person that loves weddings.  If a perfect stranger mentions a recent engagement or upcoming wedding, or even a wedding they are helping to plan, I’m immediately like “Oooh, tell me everything!!”

Second, and most importantly, marriage matters.

Human beings are not made to live solitary lives.  We get all cagey and weird when we’re not around other human beings. Now, marriage is far and away not the only relationship for human companionship (so don’t freak out if you’ve decided it’s not for you, or it just hasn’t happened for you yet…just be sure you’re hanging out with other people). But for many of us, it is one of the most important ones we’ll ever have.  There is a reason that people fight for the right to be married, a reason why people will die to be with the one they love.  It matters, deeply.

Chris and I did not get married until we were 27.  That’s not really old by today’s marriage standards, but it’s not young either.  We met in college, when we were 18.  We had a kid.  We were together (then not so much, but then again).  Even after all that time together, things drastically changed for me when we got married.  Even after thinking about this post for a few weeks, I can’t put into words what exactly it is.

There’s just something about making that promise, that vow, about giving your word.  Whether you do it in a white dress in front of all your family and friends, or you elope in jeans and flip flops, those words are transformative.

It’s not without reason that at weddings, the family and friends are addressed as well.  In addition to the couple, family and friends affirm that marriage.  We look upon the happy couple and pledge that, yes, we will honor that bond as well.  That we will encourage our loved ones, celebrate their victories and accompaniments, and hold their hands during their struggles and losses.

Which means that while my marriage matters very much to me….your marriage matters too.  It’s part of the reason why I love so much connecting with our clients even after the wedding.  That couple will probably never be our clients again (that is our greatest hope at least, until maybe it’s time for their kids to be married!), there’s no marketing deal or financial gain to be had.  I just love to watch these lovebirds learn to do life together, or adapt to doing life as man and wife.  I love to see their travel pics, their holidays.  I love it when they get a new pet, buy a new house, and have babies.

I know that seems silly, because to many of our clients I’m no one of particular importance: another vendor on their wedding team.  But to me, I got to witness this important and transformative event in their lives, so they will forever be etched on my brain just a little bit.

That’s why I film weddings.  That’s why I share anniversary posts and films.  It’s why I tear up when the DJ celebrates all the long marriage couples and your grandparents are left on the dance floor, shuffling it out to their 50+ years of marriage.  Can you imagine friends? 50 years of life together? 50 years of laughter and fun and heartache and togetherness.  50 years of the nothingness and the everything of every day life?  It’s a lot, it’s so much.  It’s everything.

(and if it doesn’t end in forever and happily ever after?  i grieve with you.  because i know that even when everyone is trying their best, sometimes things don’t go as planned. that even when the parting is agreeable, or mutual….it’s still inevitably painful…..and when it’s not…it’s unimaginably so.  reach out if you need a person)